Internal Family Systems

Staying positive, despite your inner critic, is challenging.

You wake up excited about your day. You’re involved in a big project at work, and it’s going well.

When you get to the office, you are told your boss wants to see you. You start feeling anxious.

Does your boss think your project is going well? Are you going to be taken off the project? Are you going to be laid off?

Maybe you try to reassure yourself with statements like, “It’ll be okay; you know you’re doing a good job.”

Or maybe your inner critic chimes in and says, “You’re such an idiot; of course, you’re not doing a good enough job.”

Sometimes relationships cause their own set of disappointments.

Let’s say you’ve been looking forward to the weekend.

Your partner has promised to take you out for a special dinner, even arranging childcare.

When your partner calls you at your office that day, your heart rate spikes. Sure enough, they’ve called to cancel. This is the third time in the past few weeks they’ve cancelled partner time with you.

Do you feel yourself getting upset? Are you tearful? Is your concentration gone? Do you wonder if they even love you anymore?

In situations like these, are you able to pause for a minute and notice how you feel in your body? Is it a little hard to breathe? Do you have tightness in your chest? Is your stomach churning?

Are you aware of the story you’re telling yourself?

Does any of this sound familiar?

We all have body sensations connected to our emotions; but if we haven’t learned to pay attention to them, then those sensations can become problematic.

The things we tell ourselves can help us cope with stressful situations by making us feel better – or they can make us feel more stressed by sending us down a negative thought spiral.

We all go through challenging situations throughout our lives. How do we look at these as opportunities for personal growth instead of insurmountable obstacles?

When we know ourselves and trust ourselves, challenges don’t have to put us into a tailspin of worry.

Therapy is an excellent way for us to learn how to do that.

IFS therapy helps you find a sense of self.

Of all the models of therapy I have used in over 20 years of working as a psychotherapist, I have found that Internal Family Systems (“IFS”) has proven the most effective modality for my clients’ personal growth and positive life transformation.

So, what is IFS exactly? An assumption of IFS is that we all have a central inner core referred to as the Self, which is the essence of who we truly are as human beings.

When we operate from this authentic Self, we exhibit characteristics we IFSers call “the c words,” such as calm, compassion, caring, curiosity, and centered.

We also have aspects of ourselves that IFS calls parts. Our parts are like little personalities who carry our feelings and develop their own strategies of surviving life’s ups and downs.

IFS therapy helps you find balance at all levels.

By learning to access this place of Self, we discover within us a place of calm and centered wisdom.

With this wisdom, we learn how to transform problems in order to move into a balanced state on all levels – physical, emotional, and spiritual.

As the creative expression of our own unique talents and gifts emerge, this balanced state creates room for joy.

Therapy is collaborative.

Working as a certified IFS therapist, my clients appreciate the collaborative and respectful nature of our interactions. I help people access and experience their inner core Self.

From this Self, people learn to compassionately listen to all the parts of themselves that have been impacted by their life’s journey.

This gradually leads to greater understanding and self-acceptance so that transformational change can easily unfold.

You can gain a sense of self, one with a balanced perspective.

If you’re interested in learning more about IFS, you are welcome to go to www.ifs-institute.com.

I would love to help you find balance in your life.